You imagine what we’ve seen in movies, stories we’ve been told, etc and I can only imagine what I would have ‘gathered’ from this myself. I certainly wanted to attend; now being back to my single name of McDaniel again and the thought crossed my mind about what story I would have told of myself.
Let’s see; in high school I knew lots of people – the smart (nerdy) kids, the rich kids, the ‘shitkickers’ (country kids), the populars, the unpopular, the loners, the stoners, the wanna-be’s, the naysayers and yes even some of the prayers. I firmly believed in knowing a variety and even then was open-minded (that’s a nice way of saying, I liked being nosey and wanted to just know and be liked by everyone). My mom worked at the high school, the Principal’s Assistant (kind of like my own glorified Assistant role for C-level executives); but this had its good and bad situations. If teachers hated her, I most certainly would feel the cause. When she was well liked, I took advantage of those opportunities.
Body type: I was always short, NO boobs (damn), I guess I’d say slim (didn’t weigh over 95lbs.) but luckily did enjoy my semi-round butt (hey, that would have been my only Spanish trait) and I pretty much had mid length hair but didn’t wear glasses until my junior/senior year. Oh, but senior year, I STUPIDLY cut my hair (thus the UGLY Senior portrait)… lol.
Brain/brawn: I did sports (more as electives), radio & TV, UIL (my nerd moments) of prose/poetry/drama and yearbook staff. My grades were decent, but I will admit that I loved English (the writing side) and History the best.
Dating: I didn’t really have boyfriends (hmmm, should have seen that one for the future) – I dated some guys from school (OMG, yes I had sex at 15), guys from other schools, and I dated some guys who were older (oldest was 25) and admittedly, I also picked guys based on the cars they drove – FAST and fun – (the cars, not the guys HA) and like most others, I can admit that my ‘selection’ was fairly interesting!! (Stories for another time).
So, did I graduate having set goals for my future? Apparently not. Growing up living in Section 8 housing (low income apartments); I enjoyed the fact that my mother always maintained a well kept home, made sure we always looked good, and we lived paycheck-to-paycheck, I knew that college was something I would have to work on for myself. But, I didn’t care; I still made the most of what we had. I went to Pan Am for a little bit and eventually took more classes later in Seattle.
30 years later, I can tell you that I created 2 beautiful children (a boy and a girl) who even through any tough times have made me a very happy MOM. I shared 25 years with ONE man, who I will also admit that I loved dearly. But eventually MY own independent nature and realization of who I REALLY am, could no longer endure the responsibilities of being the lead care giver, so I had to let go and move on.
What I’ve learned about myself is that I’m a gypsy, independent, strong, smart and stupid, self-sufficient, self-mutilating, truly passionate, a great liar, story-teller, explorer, embellisher and writer. Still short (wish I was closer to 95lbs), bought those boobs (although they didn’t turn out as I’d hoped – lol), my butt has gone south, I’m still enjoying sex and I still like my men like my cars (yes, now I like them both this way) fast and fun. I’m single, southern and still live paycheck-to-paycheck (sometimes less). Am I happy? I have my moments. Did I ever learn to set goals? Hell no!
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